This is Why We Hate the French

by Junior D on July 2, 2012 · 0 comments

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First of all, I have noted my non-interest in sports such as track and field. Second, if I haven’t before, I am noting my disdain toward the French. The fact that they call us ‘ugly Americans’ and yet I can’t find a single person in France that has a full set of original, clean teeth in their mouth is mind-boggling. I can find a bunch of guys that have mustaches only…it’s like there is a Magnum P.I. convention all year round. I’m straying from the point…

At the European Championships, Mahiedine Mekhissi-Benabbad had just won the 3,000 meter steeplechase; which a dumb name for a race…I picture all of them running to church. After the race was finished Mekhissi-Benabbad was walking on the track toward a mascot. He then proceeded to knock what the mascot was holding out of its hand and shoved the puffy mascot. What he didn’t know was that the mascot was a 14 year-old girl. I’m assuming he would have done it anyway. This wasn’t his first assault against a mascot. He was guilty of accosting a mascot at the European Championships in Barcelona in 2010. He, by all accounts, is a serial mascot abuser.

I’m assuming he was upset because the mascot resembled a very clean, white tooth. After he won the race, he thought the giant white, sparkling tooth was mocking him. This is not confirmed but, if you listen closely, he says something about Les Miserables and Jerry Lewis.

This is why I hate the French. Not just the arrogant pricks that live in France, but French-Canadians also fall into this category of hatred for me.

Why can’t they relax? For as many cigarettes that are smoked in that body odor haven they sure are uptight. They need to learn to take themselves a little less seriously.

I don’t understand why he thinks he’s a bad ass…because he wears nut-hugger shorts? What I find even more humorous is that this beast of a man couldn’t push a 14 year-old girl down to the ground. She stumbled a bit and even in that ridiculous mascot costume, regained her balance. Well played on her part. She should have taken the mascot costume off and ran to kick him in the berries. I wonder how funny he would have thought that was.

I don’t get the whole running around a track thing anyway. You are basically doing what everyone in the world can do, you’re just doing it at a faster pace. Maybe ESPN and other sports networks will start airing people drinking water at a rapid pace or getting dressed quickly. We could call it the Indoor World Nationals…things you do rapidly around the house.

No one cares about this race, I know, but it allowed me to write about how I dislike the French. Oh well, maybe he’ll trip and fall at his next race…I might actually watch that.

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