10 Reasons Curtis Rush is an Asshole

by Junior D on April 5, 2014 · 0 comments

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Here at Junior D Sports we have a hockey writer but I thought I would fire my shot at a complete moron that works for a newspaper in a country that is mediocre at everything it has ever done but claims to be the best at many things. If you are reading this and have yet to read the article in the Toronto Star then start there first…on second thought, fuck those French wannabes.

Apparently Curtis Rush, a writer for the Toronto Star, decided to take a shot at everything related to Columbus, OH for some strange reason on Friday April 4th. His lame attempt showed me that he has very little confidence in his team, his city and his penis. Oh yeah, I went there. Don’t write smut that leaves your entire country open to criticism…it’s not a good look.

In Friday’s article this, so-called, writer decided to list ten reasons that it’s bad for the Columbus Blue Jackets to bump the Maple Leafs out of the playoffs. Well, here is my rebuttal to his dumbass article. Here are my top ten reasons Curtis Rush should retire and jump off of the CN Tower in Toronto.

  1. I’m glad that Mr. Rush can read but there are facts that he likes to ignore. First, he ignores the fact that Forbes gave Columbus an A rating as one of the top cities for business in the United States. Why would you list that fact and then dismiss it in the next sentence? Oh, because you’re a moron. He also wrote that Toronto has the most famous mayor in the world…famous for what??? BEING A FAT, DRUNKEN CRACK ADDICT! Way to leave that fact out.
  2. Really? You’re going to make fun of the names of our teams? How about the fact that your team is the Maple Leafs…I’m pretty sure the plural of leaf is leaves! Is leafs French or does your city not have spelling and grammar check? When in doubt, trust a standard dictionary like Webster’s or the Oxford English Dictionary (OED). Merriam-Webster’s online dictionary does list leafs as an alternative plural form of leaf, but leaves is the preferred spelling, and notice that all of the example sentences use leaves, not leafs.
  3. I’m sorry that an NHL team in Columbus OHIO incorporates the flag of OHIO into their logo. Your logo is a FUCKING LEAF! Are we to believe that the Maple Leafs are better simply because they stole the leaf off of the Canadian flag and changed the color?
  4. Mascots? You’re going to the mascots card? Really? Just to let you know, the Columbus team’s mascot (Stinger) is a play on words…blue jacket, like the yellow jacket bee. Your mascot is a bear and your team name is the Maple Leafs. Please explain that one.
  5. There is no media coverage in Columbus? How about there is no media coverage in the entire United States because other sports like football control the media. As far as the NHL loving cities with great media coverage…then why are the best teams in the NHL in the United States?
  6. So, the LEAFS were part of the original six. That’s great; then why haven’t they won a Stanley cup since 1967? That would make the Maple Leafs the Cleveland Browns of the NHL. Enough said.
  7. I do apologize that Rick Nash is the most famous Blue Jacket thus far…it’s hard to have an all time great when your franchise is only 14 years old. If you didn’t have a more famous Maple Leaf then that would be another black mark on your franchise.
  8. You have two more Canadians on your team and that’s a reason that the Blue Jackets shouldn’t make the playoffs? That’s like saying pasta shouldn’t be considered an Italian dish because they stole the noodle idea from Asian countries.
  9. Attendance was the first thing on your list that actually made sense. Yes, the attendance is low but in Columbus’ defense, we only support teams that win. Anything less would be an admission that we blindly follow teams that are bad…kinda like Toronto fans.
  10. Ok, the reporters in Columbus never mention the fact that Toronto is on the Blue Jackets heels…did you ever take into consideration that we don’t think that Toronto is a threat? Sorry that all of your writers and sports talk guys have nothing better to talk about than the Blue Jackets…maybe your team should just get better so they can get into the playoffs over a young team without as much history as yours.

This is my official warning shot. Stand down Mr. Rush. Maybe you should be writing about how your beloved Toronto Maple Leafs are going to get left out of the playoffs by a team that began in 2000.

Maybe you should stop now before your whole country disowns you. You already have bloggers in your own country disowning you. Another piece of advice, more people read blogs than newspapers. You might want to start looking for a new job before your newspaper goes out of business. I’m sure Barry Melrose needs a shoe shiner, so go get your shine box ready.

The next time you decide to start a fight, how about you not choose a city with people that can kick your ass. I’m sure you can write about Paris. They won’t mind.

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